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This blog was written by Angel's fire, so you didn't have to. Expect lots of smartarsery.

(This article is a sort of a blog. Not the kind Jagex do, called Developer's Blogs which are good for nothing 90% of the time, but a sort of an 'Accomplishment Blog' which is bloody handy stuff for those who want to see how much of your life you have to give up to do While Guthix Snores)

When I'm not bollocking various members of the Unrunescape Wiki, I like to do quests. I've always had a fondness for quests, mainly because I hate skilling and PvP so it was the only thing I could do apart from pay a visit to Madame Zilyana. And I'm not that sort of guy.

(Notice the absent link to Bullshit. I'm genuinely not.)

So, as I am neither emotionally needy or a depraved lech, then I had to find something to do with myself. That something turned out to be quests. F2P doesn't count as all the quests there can be done in under 5 minutes (Even less for some of them), but my interest in questing really took off with membership. I've always loved stories. Always have, always will. Things like:

  • Mrs Wobble The Waitress.
  • The Spider Who Had Tourettes.
  • The Labour party manifesto.

Therefore, when Jagex told us about an upcoming "Grandmaster Quest", I have to admit I was excited. However, since I didn't have a crystal ball to tell me the exact requirements, and I wasn't a member of Mod Mark's clan chat, so I couldn't buy my way to level 99 in everything, I did pretty much naff-all in preparation. Therefore, it came as a nasty shock to me when I got home one evening and realised I needed to clean a lot of herbs. So my journey began which would eventually cost me millions of GP, hours of time, and the rest of my social life. Fuck you Jagex.

The StartEdit

So, I'd been a big fan of quests since getting membership a loong time ago. This had been spurred on by the Guthix Caves. I couldn't be arsed skilling so I saw burning through quests as an easy way to allow me to raise Summoning once a week whilst doing no work. I also, to my shame (I have since the inception of this blog quit for good), knew a lot about the lore of RuneScape and the whole idea of the Mahjarrat fascinated me. Incidentally, after how good While Guthix Sleeps was, I consider the Ritual Quest to be much like many R&B videos- all about the visuals than the actual content.

I was therefore fascinated when a new Behind the Scenes came out advertising a new sort of quest. Jolly good fun I thought!.. Then I realised that I would have no idea what such quest requirements would be. In the interim period I progressed through more quests, until one day in November when the quest was released.


The quest requirements were tough but fair- MEP2 was done, as was Summer's End (or at least I had plans for their completion). The Hunt for Surok was arsey but, you know what, it was doable. The problem was skills.


65 Farming. 65 Herblore. 75 Magic. FUCK.


Now I should mention that 70 was the highest level I had in any skill at that time. I can't remember, but my herblore and farming were somewhere in the 30s.

That wasn't going to stop me.

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