|This article can get you banned. If you are stupid enough to indulge in the behaviours described, DON'T SAY WE DIDN'T FUCKING WARN YOU!.|
The "Justice" System
Code of Laws:
I'm sorry, but this is all true.
Girls Don't Play RuneScapeEdit
This is a corrolary of Rule 30 of the Internet: There are no girls on the Internet. In actuality, this is not quite true as this rule was invented by 4Chan who don't understand what a woman is. Optimistic estimates put the number of real girls playing RuneScape as 1% of the population. Most of these only play because they got confused whilst looking for Habbo Hotel.
Most RuneScapers Are Thirteen-Year-Old BoysEdit
Although there are also twelve year old boys and of course also some 50 year old persons looking for a teenaged girlfriend, but those haven't read the rule above. Jagex likes to claim that most of its players are 16 year olds, conveniently forgetting that most players at any stage are new because they drift off within minutes, and they lie about their age so they don't have to use doublespeak.
Jagex Lies. All The Time.Edit
Main Article: Great Lies of Jagex
If you conducted a survey on corporate integrity, Jagex isn't way down at the bottom killing penguins and asphyxiating toddlers. They even recycle. However, their policy is that honesty isn't the best in the slightest.
People Who Play RuneScape Don't Have GirlfriendsEdit
Do you know anyone who plays RuneScape with a girlfriend? Of course not. If they did have a girlfriend they'd be talking to her and enjoying life, not killing pixellated dragons. Oh, and it works the other way round. Sorry, but even admitting you play Club Penguin will not kill a first date faster than letting slip that you know what the defence requirements for a Gravite Staff are. Or even where you get it. Or what one is. So, if you're having trouble in your love life, click that button that says "Cancel Membership" and hey presto! You're done!
If You Ever Create An Account, It Will Haunt You For The Rest Of Your Life.Edit
If people know you play RuneScape, it sticks to you like a dogshit covered in glue. You could be at a party in 10 years time and you might acciendently get out, "Hey remember when I used to play Runescape? Hey... where's everybody going?" So don't EVER mention it. In fact, don't start in the first place. Close this window now. Shut down your account. RUN.
Negligence of the Blindingly ObviousEdit
If an obvious feature can be added to an update that will make it infinitely more useful and loved by the players, the only people who will not think of such a feature are those designing the update.
Spite is UnattractiveEdit
If the above occurs, there are three possible outcomes:
- The developers will come up with a poor justification for not implementing the feature and make it a bannable offense to request it on the forums.
- The developers will implement the feature, but in a cack-handed way that pleases no-one.
- The developers will implement the feature... in about 5 years after the update itself. By this time, the whole update needs resorting as it is obsolete.