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This article is a bit rubbish due to no one knowing bloody anything about this stupid rushed quest.

We are tremendously sorry for the inconvienience.

(Think you can do better? It would be easier to crack the fucking Da Vinci Code than this!)

(muffled gunshot) (bzzzt)

I have taken over the transmission here.

Official quest description: We promised to do a quest in the Elemental Workshop series. However, we couldn't think of any plot or a decent fight in enough time. So we just got Satan himself (an old friend of Jagex) to forge a puzzle for us. Still, at least you get a great reward, right?...Right?
Release date: 25 May 2010 (Update)
Start: Talk to King Lathas in Ardougne.
Difficulty: *****
Length: Insane- possibly even worse than this.
Members only: Yes
Requirements:
  • Completion of Mind Fu- Sorry, Elemental Workshop II
  • 33 Smithing
  • 33 Defence- GF pures.
Items needed:
  • Hammer
  • 2 "primed bars"- Christ knows what these are.
  • A pickaxe.
  • A spare keyboard or 16.
  • Some Adderall
Monsters to kill: None

Why is this quest so bad?[]

Ok... Well, first of all, it's a rushed, half-assed effort for a quest, as 90% of it is just one puzzle (talk about lazy). Even worse is trying to figure out how to even open the body door. Ok ,let's see....soft clay on the book, get a mould....hmm....should I make a gold key then? Connection Lost - Please wait, attempting to re-establish....WHAT THE &%@$! yea, making a gold key makes you lag out, now that is retarded, even for Jagex. Also it turns out that I was actually supposed to make an elemental key, so why did they even program the 2 useless keys in anyway? Ook ook.


It's not rocket science![]

Rocket science was a cakewalk compared to this. What you are looking at is the puzzle from Hell on steroids. The levers are more bugged than the Stronghold of Player Safety, and there is actually no way of figuring out what you're supposed to do with them. Next problem is that there's a 50 turn limit on the machine, so if you make ONE MISTAKE, 1 hour of your life just got LOLURWASTED. Oh and did I mention you can end up breaking the gearbox and giving yourself infinite turns? Oh exploitable!

Broken machine

Its stuck at 62/73, ook ook

Your best bet is to wait until someone makes a proper quest guide for this. Which there is. Sort of.

And then some other things happen and you get your reward. It's gonna be fantastic for cracking such a hard puzzle, right...

...Right?


... Yeah right.


Rewards rewards[]

  • A Body body...Yes, they actualy called it that.
  • 8500 Smithing Smithing exp exp.
  • 8500 Defence Defence exp exp (Which means pures will avoid this quest like the plague).
  • A broken broken keyboard keyboard.
  • A whole lot of raging (Credit to an anonymous Runescape Wiki first-day vandal for this one).
  • And a stutter stutter due due to to too too many many things things being being said said twice twice.



Demoralizing information: Body shield and helm has the EXACT SAME magic defence as the mind versions, so you just got fucked over.

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