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Cannon34

The blast furnace is no expection to Rule 34

This article is about the Blast Furnace, a minigame in RuneScape. If you meant 'What Leona Lewis should be thrown into' please go to the article for 'Incinerator' on Wikipedia.

The Blast Furnace is a minigame in PruneScape where stupid kids spend their waking hours throwing the world's remaining coal into a bloody big blast furnace, so they can make it into bars and then waste all of them by making fucking throwing knives and bolts so that archers can blow him all failing to kill a Black Dragon.

Like most of PruneScape, its unnecessarily difficult to do, as you need to do a million little tasks at once so that the Blast Furnace doesn't storm out of the room blaming New Labour for the Blast Furnace team's failings. I could tell you what all these tasks are, but if you're reading this you couldn't give a bloody toss anyway.

Most people effectively rely on Blast Furnace for getting 99 Smithing, as due to the Zimbabwed price of bars compared to the Aldi price of most products of smithing, it is fairly safe to say that getting Smithing levels results in a rather large financial problem[1]. Due to this, people will cling onto any way of cutting the cost without cutting the experience points, which makes them tremoundously pathetic really.

Griefing[]

Due to the immense popularity of the Blast Furnace as a way to train Smithing, there are a certain few individuals who choose to spend some time not exactly helping out. Common practices involve crushing Ordan's[2] skull with a Dwarf Multicannon, while blocking the gate to the anvils before some very nice people blew it up to stop this happening. However, griefers are also to summon a spiritual version of The Annoying Devil, which makes more annoying sounds per hour than Miku Hatsune. These factors are about as negatively recieved as a sequel to Gigli by the smithers at Blast Furnace, who react in the following ways

  • Rage quit.
  • Spam "OMFG REPORTED"
  • Scream, shout and insult the griefers about how said griefers are wasting their time. The irony is outstanding, as when you're kinda bawling your face off about your smithing being slown down, you can't do 2 things at once.
Blast furnace rwt

Griefing stops rwt apparently

Other Information[]

The dwarves are greedy bastards, as anyone who doesn't have 60 Smithing has to sink 2.5k just to use the furnace for 10 minutes [3]. They say it's for safety. When some level 97 smither blows the shit out of the Blast Furnace due to throwing in too much bot-mined runite ore, what are they gonna do then? Thick short-arses.

For some reason, there is no bank near the Blast Furnace. Efficiency or not efficiency, that is the question.

You are able to get minor Agility for riding a 90's age exercise bike and Strength exp from doing 2 of the small jobs at the Blast Furnace. Which is okay if you have an hour to waste [4]

(Thats enough now Stormy- Angels.)

There was a dwarf sitting around, who if sold mithril to rune items, would have them so that other players could buy them, which was especially notable for Rune Platebodies, which you could buy for 45k. Of course, due to the NotReallyPersonalisedJustAnotherWayToFightRWTThatsNotActuallyThere Shops update, he has 0 stock at ALL times unless you're willing to waste money selling something to someone who is going to do nothing with it. Obselete much?

(I said that's enough. You're fired.- Angels.)

References[]

  1. Put it this way, you'd be better off putting your money with Bernie Madoff.
  2. Never trust a midget.
  3. Which sort of shits on your 'cut price smithing levels' as you have to do the first (and most tedious) lot without any price cuts.
  4. Don't lie to me, of course you have an hour to waste. You're playing PruneScape for fuck's sake.
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