Final Excalibur

Excalibur in its ultimate form

Excalibur is a sword obtained during the quest Harper's Cabinet in which King Harper screwed things up to the point that he had been trapped in a wooden cabinet after some prorogation spells went horribly wrong. This left the people of Canada in a state of no government or rather, they had a government but it was unclear whether it was dead, alive, or both.

The sword Excalibur is the only weapon in all of Canada and is obtained after talking with Canada's Governor General, aka the lady of the lake

(No! Not her! Stop that you fools! Stop doing that this instant!!)

Standard ExcaliburEdit

The original Excalibur is crap but what did you expect? This weapon comes from a land of people who are usually quite harmless

"I See Not Dead People!"

and have no need for weapons. (Important: do not ever directly engage a Canadian in combat, they can be extremely dangerous when pushed to the limit.)

Excalibur has the stats of an adamant longsword but it can be wielded at level 20 as opposed to level 30 due to it not being made using shitty American technology. It has a special attack called Canadarm in which the words "For Canada!" are yelled as the player's defence is boosted. Due to the unfriendly nature of the word "Canada," on American worlds the text displayed was sensored until it was decided that since Defence is useless anyway the weapon should be removed from the game.

Enhanced ExcaliburEdit

Upon completion of the Seers Village Achievement Diary, if you show the headband you got from Sears to the Governor
Enhanced Excalibur

A player wielding the enhanced SoulCalibur, Whoops! Wrong game...

General, she will upgrade its special attack by dipping the blade in maple syrup. At this point the weapon goes from being crap to being very sweet and sticky crap. Instead of yelling "For Canada!" you will now yell "BANKAI!!!!" and restore 20 HP through High-Speed Regeneration. This special may take up 100% of the special attack bar but it is actually very useful when going through an endless grind with random monsters as it can save food and removes the need for defence potions(not that you were going to use those anyway.)

Upon completion of the Elite Seers Diary, the weapon goes from being sweet and sticky to being "HOLY SH!!!!!!!!!!!!!TTTT THIS MEANS DA SGS FAILS NOW" as the special will now restore 40HP in total.


  • Noobs can't tell the difference between Excalibur and a Vesta Longsword
  • The other "only weapon in Canada" is an extremely powerful ranged weapon called the Avro Arrow
  • Only one player has ever been known to survive being hit by an Avro Arrow
  • Enhanced Excalibur is useful in the hands of meleers, rangers and mages alike.
  • According to legend, the sword reaches its full potential when wielded by Mercer, the President of Canada. It is said that in his hands, the sword can even kill Chuck Norris in one hit(which is pretty damn impressive even though Norris will just respawn a few seconds later and roundhouse kick him in the face.)
  • If you do not understand what the terms "20HP" and "40HP" mean, it is recommended that you read this article
  • If you are going to demand that all usage of Hitpoints in this article be converted to Life Points , we at the wikia refer you to The Reply Given in Arkell v Pressdram.

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